Thoughts you have when you are mentally messed up – Mental Health Mondays

I like the idea of just living life. In the past I have felt so strange about it all. I used to live most of my life in my head and also for other people. I used to just think, how strange that people just do all these things regardless of what others think of them and regardless of whether they have a crush or not. My anxiety, my depression and my eating disorder made me think all sorts of things. I used to constantly think about the way I looked because of the ED and anxiety every minute of every day. I would assume how others saw me and it stopped me from living life. And now I am just like:“It’s a body. Somehow others are liked despite how they look because it is not about just that. I am me no matter what I look like. I am me in a hoodie, in PJs, with eyeliner, with no makeup, in a nice dress. I used to think:”How can people just be themselves and live?” Like….I would think about being sad, about weight, about everything. Now I just sorta act myself no matter what because I don’t care what people think anymore. I wanna make art, I wanna write, sell art, write books and actually publish them, skate, play the guitar, dye my hair over and over, get more tattoos because screw it. I want to do all the crazy things in life because I want to experience it all. I want to have done as many things as possible. But not like get locked up or something. Like fun but legal experiences. XD. Imma be that cool grandma who can still walk and skate, goes travelling a lot and has a bunch of tattoos. I like the idea of living life unexpectedly, without rules, without being told what life is supposed to be like. Age is just a number when it comes to experiences. There is no age at which you have to do certain things like get married and have kids. People feel pressure to have accomplished things until a certain age but you can do whatever the hell you want at any age, any time. I don’t care. I will just live my life and be in love with it.

There’s no one like you anywhere in the world

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