I have my first working day ever behind me. Yes, I worked. XD Of course for most people it is not a big deal at all. Summer jobs, gigs….it is nothing hard. For me it was though.
I have Generalised Anxiety but also quite a bit of Social Anxiety. I have social anxiety when there are events for example and it depends on the type of situation as well. It was a small, one-time type of job. However it required travelling by train, by car and also walking to the destination. It was in the capital and although many teens I know travel quite frequently to the capital because it is not that far, I don’t really. I almost know nothing about what where is in the capital. This is also probably why I got lost. You can imagine how much anxiety I had there. Not only did I get lost, I was late. Which made me even more anxious and I had to ask many people for directions where the Social Anxiety comes in. I am not the type of person who can simply just ask someone for directions. But I had to and I did.
In the end I did get there and my job was to literally talk to people and persuade them to buy a product. So I could not be anxious. It helped me because I HAD TO talk to people. The girl who also worked there even thought I was the party type. ME! A PARTY GIRL? Yeah, right.
Overall it was very, very stresful and I was very anxious about it but I challenged my anxiety and I did work…WITH PEOPLE! I guess sometimes we do have to just jump into a scary situation in order to overcome the fear. Of course I couldn’t do this every day for sure. Maybe not even two-three days in a row. But easing into it does me a lot of good. I am going again this Friday. It is very hard to work when you have anxiety and your mental health is very fragile but I do love a challenge and what I love even more is DOING THE “IMPOSSIBLE”.